Together with my friend Lauren, we went past a tree-shaped gate and were guided by a barred owl into the shady woods of the natural burial ground, then we followed a winding path back out into the open, grassy cemetery, where I relied on guidance from my friend Carolyn to find Rachel’s headstone.
The stone itself is shiny and black. I remember at one point, Rachel said that the color black is often seen as void, or an absence, but it can alternatively been seen as holding infinite potential. This stone is so polished that it acts as a mirror, encouraging contemplative reflection and offering surprising, unexpected images.
The Shining Woman from Rachel’s Shining Tribe Tarot dances on the headstone. From one perspective, she appears to be reaching her left hand toward the small stones on a neighboring headstone. Rachel often saw faces, animals, and other symbols in stones that she found or that were given to her. Similar to the works of Philip Pullman, her stance was that the entire world is alive and imbued with meaning.
When we arrived at the site, I knelt by the grave and touched the grass to greet the spirit of Rachel that was there along with her remaining, buried molecules of matter. On this sunny, summer afternoon the grass was so very warm, it felt extra alive. I opened my arms, turned up my face, and drank in the sunlight (for a short time before retreating to the shade of a nearby chestnut tree).
I had wanted to bring a small stone to place on the headstone, in the Jewish tradition that Rachel grew up in, but I didn’t find one that felt like the one to bring. So instead I placed my “Gift of Stones” card and left it there until the wind blew it off, as if returning it to me. I thanked Rachel for the gifts she’d given me, and it felt like the gifts reverberated and reflected each other, bouncing back and forth, seeming to go on and on.
We sat under the tree’s shade for a while and I read aloud some of my poems that Rachel influenced, including Statue of Artemis of Ephesus. When I got to the line, “your wild strength is timeless as marble,” the words took on new meaning and I felt the wisdom that Rachel embodied and shared with so many people, living on in a timeless way through all of us who remember and still speak of her.
